“Sometimes, you’re on the phone and people will go, ‘Have you got a pen?’ to take down a number. And you immediately say, ‘Yes!’ even though you don’t have a pen. We all like to play a little game called, Say You Have a Pen, and Then Try to Find the Pen Before They Give the Number. So they’ll go, ‘Have you got a pen?’ You go, ‘Yes!’ Sometimes they start giving the number and you still don’t have the pen. ‘It’s 02.’ ’02.’ Sometimes you never find the pen, and you pretend to take down the number, and you never even get the number, because you feel too embarrassed to go, ‘I lied about the pen.'” ~ Michael McIntyre, Live at the Apollo
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